In our society sex is given a lot of weight. Sex is no longer limited to
an expression of love to another person. It is something that people do when
they feel like it. It is more about fulfilling your desire. In
relationships it is one of the important aspects of a relationship. It
can restore a relationship by drawing people together. However, it can also
lead to sexual infidelity. Therefore, given the importance we place on sex, if
you meet somebody that is not willing to have sex, would you still consider
dating that person? A celibate person may decide to wait until they get
married or when they believe it is the right time. Would you still be willing
to date them?
In our sexualised society, where we see sex as imperative in a
relationship, it is impossible to even see people who would entertain that
thought. Most sexually active people have the view that sex is something they
wouldn’t wait for, especially men. Being truthfully honest a lot of men say
that they would not date a celibate woman or even a woman who was a virgin. Not
saying that women don’t have the same view but it is more prevalent among men. If you are sexually active, you enjoy having sex and sex is a key
part of the relationships you form, it makes sense that you would not want to
date somebody who is celibate. If you meet somebody and you like them, and the
next thing they say is that ‘I AM CELIBATE’, you would run out of there like a
bullet. To some extent that is understandable, we are all humans and have hormones, so sex is important; but the question is to what extent should overshadow mental sex?
Me personally I like the whole courtship idea. Get to know somebody.
Simulate each other mentally and spiritually. Have intelligent conversations,
bit of banter, flirting and bring out different sides of our personality. In
my view a relationship can be enjoyed without sex. Getting to somebody before
sex is more important. Sex is good but it is even better when you wait.
The good
thing about getting to know somebody first is that when you finally get there
it will be far more intense. Sex in that case will be more meaningful. The
pleasure of getting to know each other is like a starter to get your palate ready
for the main course, so when that main course comes it will be even sweeter.
But how longer would you be willing to wait? How long is too long? Marriage? 10
years? 5 years? 3 years? Or maybe it depends
on the person, whether you think the person is special enough for you to want
for. I guess if the person is special enough you would be willing to wait even
for marriage?
